Rude LinkedIn Introductions, did you know you just sent one?

Believe it or not, this is just rude and lazy

Illin’ LinkedIn Introductions

In the last few weeks, I feel like I suddenly got popular with all the LinkedIn Introductions I have received.  Not in the “hot girl at the dance” way. Not in the “our company just got a billion-dollar valuation” way. My name is on a wall in a bathroom stall, or my LinkedIn account has hit a tipping point and has enough momentum to build on itself.

I have an issue with these Illin’ (Inconsiderate LinkedIn Lazy Intros) LinkedIn Introductions. They arrive in the inbox with no note or introduction, and I feel a lack of professionalism. If I have known you for a while and we just re-connected, I “almost” get it, but even then, would it kill someone to include a “great catching up with you”?  Lately, I have received many invites from people I don’t know, lacking a note or introduction.  Just the standard message that your LinkedIn introductions provide:

“I’d like to add you to my professional network on LinkedIn.”

For those of the Facebook generation, let me put it into perspective.  OMFG!  Seriously! That’s just rude! I don’t care how hot, popular, or rich you are. I think it is a little assuming to show up in my inbox with no introduction or purpose and ask me for something. It is one step removed from the pop-up that you receive when on a porn site that says something like “Lavender92 left you a message”.  Not that I would know. . . I work in HR.

Am I asking too much?  Am I old-fashioned?

LinkedIn introductions give professionals a great vehicle to connect. It can be super easy to reach out and touch someone. More often than not, the opportunity is squandered. With just a couple of clicks of the mouse, you can be connected. Look, Mom, no typing!  But this isn’t Facebook. This isn’t a personal and informal network for the Mamarazzi. I view this as a platform and opportunity to show off professional chops. At this point in my career, I don’t want 500 connections with people I have never worked with, emailed, or been introduced to. I would rather have 50 quality connections I trust, have worked with, or networked with. 

If I am going to connect with someone, I want the first impression to be thoughtful. Shows some respect and, yes, kisses up to some extent. I am not reaching out to you; you are reaching out to me.  Are you such a celebrity that I should jump at the chance to connect with you?

True Story

A family member was the right-hand woman to the governor of our state. The governor, whom I had never met before, came to our house to pick up the family member. I opened the door, and the governor didn’t introduce himself or say hello.  He says, “Is (family member’s name here) around?”  I was seriously pissed. Of course, I know who this guy is.  He was an Asian superhero in my mind UNTIL THAT MOMENT. Of all the people who should have some manners. . .it should be this guy. Politics aside, I want a role model and someone with some grace leading the state or country. This role IS a role model.

In our household, we were raised to invite guests into the house and never yell for someone, but to speak to them face to face. I wanted to stand before him and look him straight in the eye. Then, the coup de grâce. Without breaking eye contact, I yell out my family member’s name and say, “Some old dude is here for you!” He didn’t give me his name! I didn’t invite him and his protection detail into the house, but I went upstairs to fetch my sister. I am no Philistine.

Show up, ask for something, and assume I will run hither?

If you are reaching out to connect with me (and I am a nobody), is it wrong of me to ask WHY?  Is that vain of me?  I am not expecting anyone to say, “Hey sexy, saw your picture on LinkedIn, wanna hook up?”  But would it kill anyone to type something like:

• I heard you speak at last week’s recruiting event and wanted to reach out. I took your advice, thanks!  Let me know if I can return the favor.
• I read your blog post and wanted to reach out. What you said about networking was spot on.
• I saw that you will attend the Best Place to Work awards next week, and I was hoping I could introduce myself there; I just wanted to reach out.

Confidence and cred builder

The above gives me confidence that this connection may lead to something that we will both appreciate. It leaves me all touchy-feely-goosey-bumpy. Even if you are a vendor looking to get into our pants, at least I feel you are trying.

Am I asking too much when I ask for two sentences? Did common courtesy pass me by?

Today is your lucky day because HRNasty wants to be a role model. Be among the first five people to post this to your LinkedIn network. Your thoughts are in the comments below, and I will send you an HRNasty window decal with a handwritten thank you note. I am bringing it back old school biatches!  Boohhhyahhhh!

Video killed the radio star

Did technology kill professionalism and courtesy, like video killed the radio star? I just did a speaking event for someone last week, and the thank you I received was an email with ” thank you for speaking” in the subject line. The body of the email was blank—not even a signature. Thanks a lot, buddy.

LinkedIn introductions are a tool. As your daddy said, “Take care of the tool, and the tool will take care of you.”

See you at the after party,

HRNasty

nasty: an unreal maneuver of incredible technique, something that is ridiculously good, tricky, and manipulative but with a result that can’t help but be admired, a phrase used to describe someone who is good at something. “He has a nasty forkball”.

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