Trust me, you don’t want this

Remote Employees and upper management

Conversation when a VP gathers his or her managers to discuss a new opportunity:

VP:  “As you know, we have a new campaign coming up for Acme Publishing.  Who has someone on their team with the bandwidth for this high-visibility project?”

Mgr 1: “How about we give this new opportunity to Jenny? She just put out that Excel spreadsheet with the joins and the pivot tables.  She can crunch the Big Data.“

Mrg 2: “Johnny just delivered that PowerPoint presentation and wowed the Credit department.”

Mgr 3: “How about Suzy?  I know she is a remote employee but a steady workhorse.  She can do this.”

VP.: “I like Suzy, but this is a visible project.  I would feel much better if it were being handled in the office.  We are going to want regular status updates. If the client comes into the office to visit us, we want someone to meet them face-to-face.  Let’s go with Jenny or Johnny.”

Three candidates suddenly became two

Suzy didn’t even get to lace up her sneakers for the big game.  Not only did she decline the opportunity, but all the other managers got the message. The VP signaled that highly visible projects do not go to remote employees.  I haven’t run the numbers, but it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that opportunity creates opportunity.  Those who do well with new opportunities receive more opportunities. Those who don’t lace up never get time on the court.

This post was inspired by a colleague I work with. The company and I feel lucky to have you on the team. He passed me the infamous New York Times article.   This article shared how Yahoo CEO Marissa Mayer is “abolishing its work-at-home policy and ordering everyone to work in the office.”

His email was simple and to the point

“I don’t know what the company policy is here. I always felt that working from home should be the exception vs. the norm.” Boohyaahhhh! You gotta love this guy!

Working from home is the exception and not the norm within our company. Regardless of our company policy, this post is an HR Insider explanation of how remote employees are viewed by upper management. I believe that remote employees miss the boat called opportunity. Of course, salespeople and marketing folks with territories are an exception. For most of the population, you want to work in the office.  You do not want to be a remote employee because of a longer-than-average commute or because you think it’s “cool.”      

Perspective

• Our company subscribes to the “work in the office” environment. We purposely set it up this way to generate high-velocity, effective communication and foster a collaborative culture.    
• If you are sick and want to work from home, that’s cool—no questions asked. We don’t want anyone worried about counting sick days and coming to work. These employees will spread their petri dish of contagion and then wipe out the entire team. If you are coming down with something and want to work from home, that is not a sick/PTO day. 
• Working in HR, I have negotiated and managed the facilities for 90K+ sq. ft. of office space. I have also been responsible for spending close to $1M on new furnishings. I know how a square foot per employee ratio can translate into bottom-line dollars on the P/L. I want to say I understand employee costs.
• My fishing partner (whom I see weekly) has a successful business that supplies furniture to Fortune 100 companies. They also provide facility services, including furniture storage and department moves. The subject of hoteling, hot desking, and hot-swapping employees comes up regularly. Cutting down on space, rent, parking costs, and traffic in the local area all affect our businesses. I have some knowledge on this topic. 
• I work in a city that will make the list for worst commutes. I personally spend 1.5 hours a day, 7.5 hours a week, or 30 hours a month on the road.

Working from home is not always a benefit 

In other words, I have some background and insight on this topic.  Most HR practitioners preach working from home as a benefit. I think it is a detriment to the employee’s career.  I understand how working from home can benefit you. At the end of the day, I believe it will hurt your career.    

This is NOT a blog post about increased productivity with remote employees.  I get all that.  Blah,Blah, Blah.  This blog post does not provide any opinion on Melissa Mayers’s decision.  She is a woman CEO in tech with enough cynics watching her every move.  She doesn’t need another peanut in the gallery heckling her.  

Remote work can save the company money  

This is a blog post from an HR guy who knows how to save money on rent and employee costs with remote employees. HR can take it to the next level by hiring offshore. Yes, I did go there.  My advice: YOU SHOULD DECLINE ANY PERMANENT TELECOMMUTING OPTION AND WORK IN THE OFFICE.  As an HR Insider, this post gives you the advice I gave Mrs. HRNasty. She was recently offered a remote position because of a longer-than-average commute.  Suck it up and get your butt into the office.       

Do you allow for remote employees?

I can anticipate the above question from 8 out of 10 candidates when I interview candidates, regardless of generation.  This question comes up with the following common denominators:

• Early in the interview process, and usually before benefits and pay
• Disguised as a “culture” question vs. an employee benefit question 
• This is asked before the candidate inquires about the team dynamic or the company culture.  The candidate signals a lone wolf and doesn’t want to be part of the group.      
• Is asked with the mentality that this should be the rule vs. an exception

All of the above are flags in an interview.    

Why you don’t want to be a remote employee

You are missing out on too many intangibles when you work from home.  Remote employees are literally out of sight and mind. Upper management won’t even know you exist.  In today’s fast-changing environments, you want to be as close to the source and in the know as you can.  Even in slow-moving environments, many decisions are made in the company restroom. This is happening before and after the meeting you just dialed in for.  If you want to move your career,

YOU DON’T JUST WANT TO BE CLOSE TO THE OFFICE. YOU NEED TO BE IN THE OFFICE. 

Just a few things you will miss when you work from home:

• Is Jenny Sue in Marketing pregnant, and did BillyBob in Operations have anything to do with it? 
• Did the Sales department have an offsite and roll a golf cart?
• Did some woman Xerox her boobs at the Holiday Party?  I heard her necklace was made in the pictures, and she didn’t collect all the copies!  It sounds like a Cinderella story, except HR isn’t looking for a glass slipper.

You want to create relationships with your peers and manager. These will not be as powerful when created through Teams or Zoom. 

Ask anyone who wanted something out of their career and has worked in a remote office. They will tell you they wished they worked in the Home Office. Employees that work in a remote office:

• Are the last to know anything worth knowing
• Are not included in discussions that result in company decisions
• Do not get the same perks as employees in the home office
• They are usually forgotten or passed over when it comes to new opportunities.

Fast-tracking high-performers

Large companies who want to fast-track high performers for senior management ask employees to work a tour in the home office.  These cycles often include relocation, and declining these offers is a CLM.  The company wants to give you more access, exposure, and the opportunity to “learn more faster.”  The “Can you be trusted?” and subconscious scores have the opportunity to go up in the minds of decision-makers.  Some argue that working from home means working from a remote office. This office is in Wankerville, USA, population 1.   

Working from home a couple of times a month is one thing.   Proven employees whose circumstances have changed to a point where working from home is necessary, that is a separate matter.  Setting up a 40-hour-a-week base camp in your spare room so you can work in your PJs is a Career Limiting Move. You should either consider carpooling with a sexy driver or audiobooks for motivation to make it to work.

See you at the after party,
HRNasty

nasty: an unreal maneuver of incredible technique, something that is ridiculously good, tricky, and manipulative but with a result that can’t help but be admired, a phrase used to describe someone good at something. “He has a nasty forkball”.

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