The Doctor is in!

Job Search myths 

Job search myths get candidates declined. It surprises me how often a job seeker will ask for advice on their job search and then challenge me when I deliver the HRNasty answer.  There are preconceived ideas (I call it fallacy) about how to go about a job search. As a guy on the inside, looking out, I know these ideas keep candidates outside looking in.  I mean, these “ideas” fallacies seem entrenched in innocent minds. I don’t know where it comes from, but it is almost a Jim Jones cult mentality. I always get pushback on a few topics. Sometimes I get a lot of pushback, but arguments usually come from what I refer to as AskHoles, AKA the person who asks a question and then becomes an asshole when they don’t like the answer.    

Now, I am not calling myself a doctor, but when I ask my doctor for advice on pain in my shoulder, I don’t challenge her. She has studied and practiced for years and has seen both failures and successes when it comes to outcomes. Usually, the failures are the patient’s fault, and the successes are the result of professional intervention. 

A recent scene in the doctor’s office: 

HRNasty:  My arm doesn’t have a full range of motion. This affects my casting when I am fly-fishing. 

Symptoms: It hurts to raise my arm above my head and hurts to set the hook. I get pain when I leverage to the rod when reeling in fish.

Doctor:  How often do you go fishing? 

HRNasty:  2 days a week, 7 hours a day. 

Doctor:  Are those two days in a row?

HRNasty: Yes, how did you know?  Sat and Sun.

Doctor: I am a paid professional. Take a rest. For the next month, you get one hour of fishing a week. I will give you some exercises to strengthen your shoulder. Do these exercises three times a week for 15 minutes, twice a day. 

This is where HRNasty can either take one of two directions: 

I can be the AskHole and throw a tantrum.  “Doc, I gotta go fishing; you don’t understand. . . the fish are in; this is THE season; I live in the Steelhead capital OF THE WORLD!  You are not going to keep me on dry land!” 

Listen to your doctor

Take the sensible route and rest up, per the doc’s orders. She has seen this play out several times.  

Again, I am no doctor. I have seen 100’s, if not 1000’s, of candidates run through the gauntlet called the interview loop. I am a pretty good predictor of who will come out with an offer and who is not.  More importantly, I can decipher WHY they won’t come out with an offer.  

So, with that in mind, the “Doctor is in,” and I thought I would try to set the record straight as we move into the new year and candidates attack their job search with new vigor.  

The Job Search Myths: 

One-Page Resume 

When I ask who recommends that resumes be one page, I hear answers all over the map:  Career centers, parents, professors, or high school career counselors.  When was the last time the guy at the career center had to go out into corporate America and try to find a job?  When was the last time he filled a job opening as a recruiter?  I say this 3 times a month:  Did Leonardo Da Vinci limit himself to a 1-page resume?  Did Einstein have a 1-page resume?  I wrote a more civilized version of how I really feel here. 

The bottom line is that if the information is relevant to the position you are applying for, include it.  If you have a resume with irrelevant information about the position “cut it out”.  This doesn’t mean it can ONLY be one page.  If you have been working for 7 years and you only have 1 page of accomplishments, I will question how productive you were.  Whoever is telling candidates that they need to limit their resume to one page is doing folks a disservice.  

Doesn’t Matter What You Wear 

I work in tech, and it surprises me how often candidates show up for an interview in a pair of jeans and a t-shirt.  I appreciate expensive jeans just like the rest of the world, but this isn’t what is being represented.  Selvedge is flossy, faded baggies with holes or jeans that were purchased 10 pounds ago makes the following statement:  “I just don’t give a shit, they covered my skid marks didn’t they”?  There is a reputation in tech that because the dress code is casual and employees are in flip-flops and shorts, it is ok to show up with the same to the interview. 

I know plenty of employees who landed jobs wearing a t-shirt and jeans, but I bet they left money on the table.  If we have two candidates of equal ability, the customer interaction factor comes into play.  When interviewing any candidate, in the back of my mind, I wonder if I can put this candidate in front of our largest customers or VPs from other departments.  I love it when we find these candidates.  They are GEMS!  Those who are good at their job AND can present themselves well receive more opportunities and earn more in the long run.  Establish yourself during the interview as a jeans and t-shirt employee; you are burning a hot iron into your ass with the “keep me in the corner and behind a desk” brand.   No one likes the smell of burning flesh in the morning.    

Social Media Doesn’t Matter in a Job Search 

Really???  To this, I say that Social media isn’t just social anymore.  Social media is for promoting brands, companies, new products, and winning presidential elections.  Ask President Obama if he feels like social media made a difference in his last two job hunts. There are so many ways that social media can help your job hunt that if you don’t get this one, I will not waste my breath. When recruiters and hiring managers get your resume, where is the first place they go to check you out? Don’t just post about where you were last Friday night; share current trends in your industry! 

I know How to Answer Interview Questions  

When I practice mock interviews with candidates, I would say that 95% of the folks have an answer to most interview questions. The problem is that the answer is buried in a 4-minute diatribe. The answer doesn’t reveal itself until minute 2 minutes into the answer.

• Long-winded answer.  Most people quit listening after 15 seconds of not getting an answer to a question asked.  No one wants to ask a question and then sit through 45 “dog” seconds of the “set-up” for the answer. I have also developed the skill of not chewing my arm off as I finally hear their “final answer.” 
• One sentence answer.  I interpret short, unemotional responses as having no effort. Interviews should be an equal back-and-forth conversation.  
• Answer interuptus.  I am interrupted and cut off whenever I try to explain something to the candidate.  The candidate is in a rush to prove they have the answer and knows what I am talking about they cut me off to prove their point.      

Translation

They all translate to “We really appreciated meeting you and will get back to you with next steps.  Don’t call us, we will call you”.  

Unless you have heard about any of the above job search myths from a recruiter, ignore the information.  I don’t ask my plumber about my shoulder, I ask a shoulder specialist. 

See you at the after party,

HRNasty 

nasty: an unreal maneuver of incredible technique, something that is ridiculously good, tricky and manipulative but with a result that can’t help but be admired, a phrase used to describe someone who is good at something. “He has a nasty forkball”.

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