Interview turn-off’s
Dating has its faux pas, which is very similar to interview turn-offs. With this in mind, this week’s post tries to relate the concept of dating, which EVERYONE can relate to with job interviewing experience. The connection between these two activities should be easy for everyone to recognize. Finding a job is just like dating. To keep my bad dates, I mean bad interviews, to a minimum, I thought I would reinforce the message. As a recruiter and a guy in the middle of the pack of single guys chasing tail in 2013, I am reminded every day why so many people are single and struggling to hook up.
Uncanny similarities
I think the similarities between dating and interviewing are UNCANNY. I can only imagine that the same mistakes I see candidates make during the day are those made by singles after 5 PM. Finding a job or a date is easy. Finding a job or a date where both parties appreciate each other in an LTR is an entirely different story. There may not be a bar or casual sex involved when interviewing, but there are a lot of similarities. Moving forward, refer to me as Hitch for the corporate world.
I recently stumbled across this article on the Faux Pas of dating, and I couldn’t help but click on the link. Sure enough, the similarities were uncanny for me as an HR pro-am.
The following Turn-off and Dating Lessons to learn in bold below are taken directly from the above-linked article. As your corporate Hitch, I interpret these lessons learned for you into job interview speak.
Turn-off #1: “She checked her makeup non-stop.”
Per the article, this is a dating turn-off. This is absolutely an interview turn-off as well. If you are paying more attention to yourself than you are paying attention to the recruiter or hiring manager, you have your priorities in the wrong place. The hiring company isn’t paying you to look good. The hiring manager is paying you to get a job done. Even if you are a professional model, there will be a stylist and a makeup person to make you look good, so there is no reason to worry.
There is nothing like escorting someone (male or female) to the interview room and watching them check themselves on every glass surface we pass that offers a reflection of their self-absorbed beauty. True story: I escorted an attractive candidate into a room where everyone was heading to work. The candidate stated, “Wow, you guys work hard here”. I asked, “What do you mean?” The reply was a classic and one I won’t forget: “Well, none of the guys looked up at me when I walked in.” Can I get a Mirror?
Dating lesson to learn: Don’t obsess about your appearance, ladies (and men)
HRNasty lesson: If your car’s rearview mirror is angled so you can check your look compared to the car behind you, re-read Turn-off #1 one more time.
Turn-off #2: “He blabbed constantly about his ex.”
No one appreciates being around someone who is constantly putting down their ex. It becomes clear that the person who was dumped hasn’t moved on. They live in the past because it’s their lonely, bitter way. We want to blurt out, “Get over it already; he/she obviously did,” but we usually just end up nodding in agreement to the blather and feeling sorry for the lonely schlep.
When a candidate comes in and continuously references their ex-employer negatively, it’s an interview turn-off. Whether the breakup was mutual or one-sided, I want to make an offer to someone looking towards the future and not stuck in the past. It is one thing to talk about an ex-employer when using examples of professional accomplishments; this is acceptable and expected.
Losing my lunch
If you feel your prior employer mistreated you and referenced this 3 times or even once, I just started to taste my lunch. Singles want to hang out with someone who is “Over their ex and has moved on.” Employers are no different and want to work with candidates who have “Moved on already.” Moving on is a sign of being adaptable to change, positive, and looking towards the future. Don’t say anything if you have nothing nice to say about your prior employer.
Dating lesson to learn: Bashing your ex makes you look terrible
HRNasty lesson: Bashing your ex-employer makes you look petty. They were paying you, after all.
Turn-off #3: “He was obsessed with the size of his wallet.”
In the same way that most singles don’t want to hear about how much money you make, as a recruiter, I don’t want to hear that all you care about are the benefits, parking, salary, bonus, and what’s in it for you. This is a big interview turn-off. This is the corporate equivalent of a GoldDigger and a trifling candidate. GoldDiggers don’t have the makings of a mature long-term relationship personally.
Most LTRs are successful because both parties are interested in each other as individuals. Companies want to hire candidates who are sincerely interested in the position, challenges, and manager, and yes, benefits are necessary, but should not be the priority. Bring up the benefits and the salary towards the end of the interview loop. Candidates who bring up benefits and salary requirements in the first interview will probably not see the second interview.
Dating lesson to learn: Money can’t buy you love
HRNasty lesson: Money can’t buy love, but it can rent it. Hiring managers want to buy, not rent.
Turn-off #4: “He paid more attention to his computer than to me.”
There is nothing like going on a date where the date is on their phone texting their other friends. We don’t know what they are texting, and this distraction sends the message that whoever they are texting is more interesting than we are.
In an interview, there is nothing more frustrating than a cell phone going off or a candidate who states, “Can you give me just one sec? I need to send this text.” All I can do is assume the candidate will act this way in a business meeting if a position is offered. Candidates who need to focus on their phones during an interview indicate where their priorities will be if hired. We don’t want your phone to be a priority over our customers. Your date wants you to focus on them, not their PC or the phone. I want a candidate to focus on the interview.
Dating lesson to learn: Keep noise distractions to a minimum
HRNasty: Turn off your cell phone before entering the front lobby of the company you are interviewing.
Turn-off #5: “He had terrible phone etiquette.”
Calling early, late, and on weekends isn’t scoring any points. All I can imagine is that you don’t have any personal awareness, or you are scared to talk with me, and want to leave a message. Neither are qualities that a company wants to pay for.
I have blogged about phone etiquette here. How you answer the phone, your ringtone, and your voicemail message all send signals that can end the interview before it starts.
Dating lesson to learn: Be considerate of someone’s time
HRNasty lesson: Be considerate of the recruiter’s time.
Transferable
So, you see, lessons learned on the dating scene are directly transferable to the job interview. If you have any questions about the interview process, just treat the interview like a date with someone who is of special interest to you.
See you at the after party,
HRNasty
nasty: an unreal maneuver of incredible technique, something that is ridiculously good, tricky, and manipulative but with a result that can’t help but be admired, a phrase used to describe someone good at something. “He has a nasty forkball”.
If you feel this post is valuable, please subscribe here. I promise no spam,
and “like” us on Facebook. I read all the comments below.Thank you!
Leave a Reply