Company holiday parties? Mind your P’s and Q’s
A typical post from HR around this time of year discusses why we call Christmas parties “Holiday parties.” How we need to be sensitive to different cultures, blah blah blah. As a minority, I appreciate the sentiment, but as per the below, I will be the Grinch that Stole Christmas. I have a bit to say about this topic, so I will break this up into two posts. This post won’t just talk about “What” you should avoid. More importantly, “Why” and “How” your manager and HR department view these holidays. I see plenty of lists that say “how not to act.” I don’t see WHY this behavior indicates future behavior and how it relates to your career and the business. See this classic Holiday FAIL
How do managers and HR REALLY view Holiday parties?
Each year, I hear from HR and Execs colleagues how someone at a holiday party did something that will stay with them for the rest of their career. The most common complaint from HR and Senior Managers is when employees don’t show up. The company put a lot of effort into holding a party to say “thank you” to the employees. Don’t give them the finger by not showing up. The sad thing is employees won’t even know that their holiday party behavior is what is holding them back. Everyone in HR will. Trust me, the only guy who will remember you for performing the Heimlich maneuver to save someone’s life is the life you saved. Everyone else will remember the drunks, those getting sick in the restrooms, and those who passed out.
What do we remember about holiday parties?
We think getting drunk is OK at the holiday party because no one is fired the next day. It isn’t OK. Trust me. It is a straw on the camel’s back, and these straws add up. When you are up for promotion, guess what will enter the discussion. In this economy, you don’t want any extra straws. In this economy, it takes fewer straws to break the back. Memorable Holiday Party behavior isn’t just a straw; it is a bale. You could have had a Million Dollar 4th quarter, but you will be remembered for dancing on the table long after that commission is donated to charity. The stories that people remember and talk about YEARS later are not how you closed Acme Publishing but how you got drunk and embarrassed yourself. Think about your past holiday parties.
CLM = Career Limiting Move
1. Most people advise you NOT to drink. Most companies provide alcohol. If you are going to drink, try to eat something so you don’t arrive on an empty stomach. You may see an open bar and Top Shelf alcohol being provided “on the house.” I see the lewd and obnoxious behavior. It is usually an hour or so before dinner is served, and this isn’t Friday night when your wallet paces your drinking. This is a celebration, and someone else is paying. Pace yourself. The first job out of school usually means the first experience with an “open bar.” It Happens every year.
Your behavior answers the question: Can you be trusted with the company credit card to entertain clients?
Don’t bitch
Avoid complaints about your job or your manager. Alcohol always loosens the tongue. It is easy to bitch about something once the party is started, and others also see the glass half full. With unemployment in the double digits, be glad you have a job. You never know who will be around the corner.
Bitching about your manager is a sin only second to bitching about your customer. If you are bitching about one, you are probably bitching about the other.
Dress appropriately
Wear what is appropriate for the occasion. Make sure it is clean and presentable. If jeans are appropriate, wear some clean jeans. Don’t wear your “I am going to walk my hem off” jeans for the party. Not everyone understands the distressed, ripped, $350.00 Japanese Selvedge attitude. There will be people who don’t get that fashion statement. There will be others who think you can’t be trusted with a budget. They are usually the ones who influence your career.
Behavior indicates: If you can’t dress appropriately when asked, do you follow directions? Will you represent the company to the outside appropriately?
Flirtatious Behavior
Keep the flirting to a minimum. Be remembered for your intellect. not for your game. Yes, most couples meet at work, but every decision-maker impacting your career will be at this function. Don’t use alcohol as your liquid courage. Be discreet.
Don’t hate the players; hate the game. Once you are labeled as less than a mind and more than a flirt at a holiday party, you might as well quit. Even if it isn’t true, everyone listens to gossip.
Don’t drive home Drunk.
Get a ride, call an Uber, or sleep on the floor. If you work in HR, provide vouchers.
Nuff said.
HRNasty
More ways to limit your career in the second post here.
Post Script
HRNasty works for a privately held start-up alongside a small and dedicated group of geeks, hipsters, and technical badasses that have created a very unique culture. Our Christmas party is to say “thank you” to not just them for their hard work but to their spouses for their patience and flexibility. We will serve alcohol and plenty of it. Fun has a different definition for everyone, and we don’t just respect that; we embrace it. I hope that this is the best party folks will attend all year long, and we let everyone know multiple times that nothing you say or do will affect your career on this night. Together, we are building a culture of “work harder than you ever have and play harder than you ever have”, where the management team will blow off steam at a pace that will be hard to follow. I came to this company to work in a place where people can concentrate on their work and not what others think, where there are no rules, only guidelines. Meritocracy, plain and simple.Thank you to my colleagues who “embrace work hard, play hard.”
To the friends I have the fortune to work with. Look for me out on the deck that night. I will have plenty of cigars for anyone interested, and I hope we can relax, talk shop, and dream about 2013. The only rule we will ask folks to be conscious of is item number 5 above.
See you at the after party,
HRNasty
nasty: an unreal maneuver of incredible technique, something that is ridiculously good, tricky, and manipulative but with a result that can’t help but be admired, a phrase used to describe someone good at something. “He has a nasty forkball”.
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