New managers tend to make three mistakes with 1-on-1s: they skip them, turn them into status updates, or never explain what the meeting is for. Experienced leaders avoid all three. This post explains why a weekly cadence, set up with a clear purpose and kept weekly, builds the trust that makes everything else possible, including your ability to advocate for your team and your manager’s ability to advocate for you.
You’re Not Ready
A fishing guide once told a newer angler, flat out, “you’re not ready.” It felt harsh — until I saw what it actually protected him from. The same call happens at work every day, and most managers get it wrong.
You Were Already Doing It Right
You thought about what to wear. You told your family. You showed up ready to prove something. That version of you had the right instincts. Here’s what happened next—and what to do about it.
Your Manager Can’t Defend What They Don’t Know
Most employees focus on doing the work. Fewer understand how the work gets perceived under pressure. When a layoff list is being made, your manager’s ability to defend you depends entirely on what you’ve told them.
The Conversation Most Managers Never Have with Employees
When a manager walks into their boss’s office and says “Johnny is a poor performer” — they think they’re reporting a problem. What they’re actually doing is signaling one. Because the first question in that room, spoken or not, is always: “What have you done about it?” This post covers what leadership is quietly evaluating when you bring them a struggling employee, how to have the honest conversation most managers are afraid of, and why that conversation is the kindest thing you can do — for Johnny and for yourself.
Silence Isn’t Safety
Most employees assume that if something were wrong, their manager would say something. That assumption quietly derails more careers than poor performance does. The same manager who tells you you’re doing great will say in a closed-door meeting: “Johnny is solid, but he’s not showing the initiative we need for a client this size.” That’s the real feedback. And Johnny never heard it. This post explains why managers hold back, what gets said when you’re not in the room, and the specific questions that open the door so they’ll tell you the truth.
Why Your Micromanager Might Be Your Fault
“Micromanager” is one of the most loaded words in the workplace. The moment someone uses it, the story is already written: manager is the problem, employee is the victim. After decades in HR, I want to offer a different read. Sometimes the micromanager isn’t the problem. Sometimes you are.
Your Career Isn’t Your Manager’s Career
Your Career Isn’t Your Manager’s Career
Early in my career, managers were something close to mythical.
They were the smartest people in the room. The ones who had figured it out. When you had a problem you couldn’t solve, you brought it to them. They weren’t just technically sharp — they were role models. The better ones didn’t just tell me the answer, they asked me my opinion and worked the problem with me.